


A Guy Walks into a Bar

by Mendax



Category: The Adventures of Brisco County Jr., The Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-01
Updated: 2014-08-01
Packaged: 2018-02-11 08:14:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2060673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mendax/pseuds/Mendax
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bowler makes an entrance. And an exit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Guy Walks into a Bar

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Deannie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deannie/gifts).



JD sidled into the saloon, trying to look like he wasn’t hurrying. He sighed with relief when he saw Buck and Vin sitting near the door (though he still glanced around, hoping to see Chris as well) and dropped into a chair at their table, cutting off Buck mid-word.

“Fella ‘bout to come in. Looks like trouble.”

JD had been sitting outside the jail and seen him riding in. A tall black man in a trail-dusty black coat on a big black horse he made look like a pony. He wore a long knife at his boot, one gun at his hip and another — a two-barrel shotgun cut down like Vin’s rifle — across his back. He had long hair, a short beard, and the kind of ferocious scowl that made people want to cross the street to get away from him. _Looks like trouble_ was an understatement.

No sooner were the words out of his mouth than the batwing doors burst inward with enough force to bounce them on the hinges and the man strode straight to the bar. “Brandy!” he barked, and Billy nearly fell over his own feet trying to move fast enough to please him.

“Ah, hell,” Vin muttered almost too quietly to be heard. JD glanced over to see him slouch deeper into his chair and ease the brim of his hat lower over his face.

“You know him?” JD whispered in surprise.

“Relax, Tanner,” the man at the bar boomed. “I ain’t here for you.”

He got his brandy and walked over as JD wondered how on earth he’d seen Vin when he hadn’t even looked their way. Vin grimaced, and shoved the last chair away from the table with his foot in invitation. “Reckon not. Y’ain’t exactly the type fer subterfuge. Fellas, this here’s Lord Bowler. He’s a bounty hunter. Buck Wilmington, JD Dunne.”

“You’re a bounty hunter?” JD couldn’t help the tone. Vin didn’t seem worried none, but that money was still on his head, and this Lord Bowler — and what kinda name was that anyhow? — sure _seemed_ like a threat. He noticed Buck didn’t look any too friendly either, and that made him feel a little better.

“I’m _the_ bounty hunter,” Bowler said as he took the offered chair. “But a man’d have to be a blamed fool to think Tanner here murdered some farmer in cold blood, and I ain’t no fool.”

He had a real belligerent way of talking, like somebody _had_ called him a fool and he was right angry about it. Made JD edgy, but Vin just tipped his chin.

“You on someone’s trail then?” Buck asked. “Just, we’re the law around here; there anything we ought to know?”

Buck had a way of stressing “law” when he brought it up around someone he didn’t much like. JD was torn between wanting to smile and hoping Bowler hadn’t noticed. Buck was good in a fight, but this guy was _huge._

“The law, huh?” Bowler sized Buck up and didn’t look too impressed. “I don’t see a badge.”

Vin outright grinned. “We ain’t exactly that kind of law.”

“We?” Vin shrugged a little and JD straightened up in his chair. Bowler seemed to notice him for the first time, and his eyebrows went up. “How many not-exactly-that-kind-of lawmen you need in this town?”

“Well, there’s seven of us ... Reckon most of the time that’s been enough.”

Bowler looked skeptical, like he’d decided a joke was being played and he wasn’t sure yet whether to laugh or get angry, when there was a bit of a commotion around the door and a horse walked in.

JD blinked and looked again.

Yep, that was a horse all right. 

Then things got even weirder.

Lord Bowler stood up so fast the chair fell over, and he stomped over to the horse, put his hands on his hips and started shouting. “No. Do you hear me, Comet? I ain’t — an’ Brisco don’t even come hisself? Just sends you? No! I done told him, I don’t care if it is the coming thing, I ain’t—”

His tirade was interrupted by the horse — Comet, apparently — breathing a gusty sigh, stretching out his neck and snatching off Bowler’s, well, bowler, with his teeth.

“You give that back!” Bowler lunged after his hat, but the horse easily evaded him simply by dodging its neck out of the way. Another swing, another dodge, and the chestnut started backing out of the saloon, tossing his head to wave the hat like a red cape for a bull and just as effective, except bulls don’t tend to have that much of a cussing vocabulary.

When his rump hit the door, Comet spun and darted back out, Lord Bowler hot on his heels. “You get back here you flea-bitten nag! I will line your blanket with burrs! Yo' momma was a mule!”

JD rushed to the window to see Bowler, still shouting, in the process of trying to unhitch his horse and get a foot in the stirrup all at once, with Comet, hat still between his teeth, keeping a coy distance until he succeeded. Then there was only a dust cloud left as they barreled out of town.

He turned back to the saloon, drew a breath, but couldn't find anything to say.

Vin seemed to sum up everyone’s feelings on the matter with a quiet, succinct, “Huh.”

With that, noise and life returned, a swell of laughter and “I ain't never!”s 

JD dropped back into his seat as Buck leaned forward, eyes twinkling even as he shook his head and tried to look earnest. “See, JD? Even the horse thinks it’s a stupid hat.”

**Author's Note:**

> Short bit of silliness for Deannie for the Mag7 Daybook Summer Stocking exchange. Yeah, I know the timelines don't match up. Can we consider it part and parcel of the anachronisms (intentional and not) of the shows?


End file.
